Something shifted.

A quiet, steady unraveling that’s still in process.

After taking space for a full digital and major-work detox, I came back feeling… uhm… “different”.

Surprisingly, in a deep, fundamental way—the urgency, the pressure, the compulsive need to prove something… all of that loosened their grip. And in its place, a spaciousness I haven’t felt in a long time opened up. It felt like I was finally back in my body, back in my life, back to listening to my soul.

I didn’t have the same urge to race back into old patterns or force myself into productivity loops. I didn’t crave the grind. I didn’t want to jump back into optimizing anything.

I wanted to completely slow down.

It felt like I’d cleared an old slate I didn’t even realize I’d been clinging to. And now, instead of returning to “normal”, I’m choosing something else entirely.

I want more of a life. Not just more work.

During the summer solstice, I sat down for a long, honest journaling session, which I’ve continued in the past few days. No urgency, no agenda, no filters. Just me, the truth, and all the emotions I’ve been too busy to fully feel in the past 6 months.

I saw all the ways I’d stopped taking care of myself.

I saw where I’d let work wrap itself around every corner of my identity, my life.

I saw where I’d abandoned hobbies that once lit me up, postponed joy, and told myself there would be “time for that later”.

I thought by diving into what needed to be done would give me quicker results, make up for lost time since I kept feeling behind, and let all that busyness I was churning in to prove my worth.

But this detox forced space between me and the systems, beliefs, and patterns I’ve outgrown. Once the noise of the shoulds, musts, and have-tos cleared, my actual priorities started to show itself as that death-clench of “I have to make this work now” finally stopped having a hold over me.

This isn’t about tossing my work (or what I’ve done) out the window. It’s about reorienting to it differently than I’ve done before and distinctly from what I’ve been told I should be doing.

This isn’t a pivot. This is a recalibration.

What I’m stepping into now isn’t a fast fix or applying some clever new strategy. It’s a slow, layered reset built on:

• A series of small but meaningful shifts

• Honest experiments and follow throughs

• The willingness to try, assess, and tweak as I go

I know I haven’t written an “Experiment Field Notes” in a while. Not because I’ve stopped experimenting, but because I needed the privacy and space to process this soul retuning chapter without narrating it in real time.

Sometimes, the deepest transformation needs to happen off the record. At this moment, I can only share those bigger thematic lessons I’ve been going through.

And it has been A LOT! This pause gave me more than just rest. It gave me deeper perspectives, and it’s been showing me a different way to work and live my life.

One of the deeper realizations I keep returning to, which is something I think a lot of entrepreneurs overlook, is this:

We’re great at chasing clarity, but we rarely leave space for integration.

We just jump straight back into implementation, which repeats the same patterns of overworking, staying busy to act productive, and hustling our way back into burnout.

When you’ve been in the churn (maybe for years, maybe for decades), what is actually needed could be more than just rest.

You need time.

Time to confront the subtle cost of survival mode.

Time to feel what you’ve been numbing with constant motion and busyness.

Time to slowly relearn what you enjoy, what you miss, and what kind of life you actually want to build around your work, not underneath it.

That’s what this season is about for me.

Not a break. Not a burnout recovery sprint. No hacks or shortcuts. But a conscious reimagining and reexperiencing of how I want to live, work, connect, and create.

…which means for now, my presence here might continue to feel minimal.

But what I’m building behind the scenes is far from small. I’m here for a deeper, long term transformation.

There’s more to come, but in no rush.

Because this time… I’m not abandoning myself in the name of momentum. I’m leaning fully into this slower, steadier reset, making it something that truly makes a difference.

P.S. If this helped you give language to the quiet shift you’ve been craving, too, tap the ❤️ to let me know. Share or restack this post to support others who are questioning the speed they’ve been living at and also desiring the need for space to feel what’s actually true.

You’ve absorbed a lot.

Courses, podcasts, webinars, swipe files, frameworks, freebies, books. Endless voices and ideas telling you how to grow your business, find your niche, boost your visibility, scale your offers, and work smarter.

While some of that was helpful, you’re probably past the point of information overload.

I know that was where I was at. I felt my mind blue screen, and had to force quit all the content consumption that just created more guilt, stress, and pressure of not doing enough, not performing more, and not succeeding fast enough.

I realized that at this stage, the real work isn’t about learning more. It’s about learning how to listen better to yourself.

Which is why it might be the perfect moment to temporarily initiate a digital detox, to step away from all those external influences for a moment. Not out of avoidance, but as an intentional pause to clear away any mental clutter so you can finally hear what’s true to you.

Because here’s the thing…

You cannot discern your own inner voice when it’s constantly overcrowded or muffled under everyone else’s.

Your nervous system needs time and space to decompress. Your soul needs breathing room to sort and filter. When given the silence, your unconscious mind will start to surface what actually feels aligned.

But none of that will do when you’re keep mindlessly scrolling for “what’s missing.”

Silence brings up what you've been avoiding

One of the biggest misconceptions with this process is assuming that you’ll instantly know what’s aligned once you unplug.

But clarity doesn’t usually show up in the form of a grand, quick download.

It emerges slowly…
After you’ve slowed down from the urgency…
After you’ve faced the discomfort of the silence…
After you’ve detach yourself from all those other voices…

What often comes up first is fear, in forms of guilt and shame.
Fear that you’re falling behind.
Fear that you’ll miss out on something important.
Fear that you’re losing momentum without constantly performing.

But those fears?

They’re actually doorways into something so much more.

Instead of avoiding them, which most people do out of discomfort, moving through them is what allows your real clarity to emerge.

When you let yourself process what’s underneath your need to consume more, that’s when your nonnegotiables, your values, and your hell-no’s get much louder.

No, you don’t need more options. What you actually need are fewer influences so your own inner compass can actually guide you.

How to detox from the noise, and tune into what’s real.

Here are three ways to reclaim your clarity by doing a digital detox:

1. Create space to hear yourself again

   Unfollow. Unsubscribe. Mute. Delete apps if you need to. This isn’t permanent. It’s not as a rebellion. It’s a reclamation of your mental space and soothing your overstimulated nervous system.
   

   Replace content consumption with the space to process what you already know or evaluate your current status quo. That might look like journaling, walking without podcasts, or even pondering on a single question for some time.
   

   Your clearest insights often come from stillness, not more stimulation.

2. Feel the fear, and explore what it’s trying to protect.

   When that itch to scroll or “just check one thing” pops up, pause and ask: What am I hoping to feel by doing this? What part of me feels unsafe being unplugged?

   
   This reflection doesn’t need to be dramatic. It just needs to be honest. Fear, when met directly, often reveals your deepest truths.

3. Let your inner compass sort the noise

   Rather than looking for the next big or trendy idea, give yourself permission to sit with everything you’ve already absorbed: What still feels relevant? What feels outdated? What never felt like you in the first place?
   

   This isn’t about discarding or rejecting everything. It’s about filtering and discerning more intentionally based on your own guidelines. Let your inner wisdom curate what stays.

This digital detox isn’t about disappearing or hiding out in a hermit cave (although I call this state of mine my “hermit mode”). It’s about removing enough noise so you can hear your own “yes,” your own “no,” and your own way forward.

Because your best strategy isn’t out there. It’s already within you, waiting for some breathing room to rise to the surface.

Do this now… before you waste another quarter on what’s not working.

The kind of honest recalibration helps you course correct and what actually moves the needle.

Because if you keep tuning into everyone else’s business model, marketing strategies, or launch plans, you’ll keep building a version of success that was never really meant for you.

And if you’re not careful, your second half of the year could turn into another six months of trying to force momentum from strategies that don’t fit.

But this midyear can be different. It doesn’t need more noise, stretching you thinner. It needs your truth, solidifying what’s right for you.

And that only comes when you’re willing to do the boldest thing most entrepreneurs avoid: Stop absorbing. Start integrating.

Yes, learning from others can quickly shortcut you timeline to help you make less mistakes and do what worked for them. But that continual chase can also send you down unnecessary detours. It could distract you from what actually feels true to you.

This is your permission to step back so you can step into your own clarity.

Your next step isn’t hidden in more content. You don’t need more inspiration.

You need integration and permission to drop the pressure and process what you’re always aware of but might be too scared to face or address.

Give your soul the space to whisper what your mind has been too loud to hear. Allow the quiet and the pause to help you fully listen. Show up as the version of you that’s brave enough to unplug, tune in, and move forward with more intention.

This isn’t about erasing what you’ve learned or what you’ve done. It’s about reclaiming the wisdom that’s already yours.

When you stop chasing what everyone else is doing and finally tune into your own insights, you reclaim a sense of knowing and greater self trust that no algorithm, course, or program could ever give you.

So no, the clarity you’re looking for isn’t out there somewhere.

It’s already in you, waiting for the noise to die down long enough to be heard.

PSST! If you’re feeling the quiet nudge to detox from all the noise…

I’m thinking of creating a space for a small, intimate group to do this together.
Just 5 days. Simple prompts. Daily guidance. Room to breathe.

Let’s unplug together with gentle support, simple to follow structure, and a safe space to explore what’s true for you.

P.S. If this gave you permission to stop chasing and start listening, tap the 💜 to let me know. Share or restack this post to support others who are quietly overwhelmed and ready to find their own clarity again.

Psst, lean in... *whispers* I started doing something a little different in my workday… and noticed a shift almost immediately.

I wasn’t as scattered. My brain felt clearer. I was getting more done, and with less effort.

I felt focused, even though technically… I was doing multiple things at once.

That’s when I realized—
I wasn’t multitasking.
I was multipurposing!

And that small distinction changed how I work, how I feel, and what I was able to get done.

Look, I’m still in the early-ish stages of my Sandbox explorations with this, but there was just something about this that I had to look into more and explore how this subtle shift can change how we work… and create better quality results.

Less but Better, right?

Multitasking vs Multipurposing

At first glance, they might seem similar.

Both involve more than one thing happening at the same time. But the way they function—and what they do to your nervous system, output, and energy—is completely different.

Multitasking splits your focus.

It scatters your energy across different tasks, as your focus flips flops between one thing to another. Sure, it can feel productive, but it usually leaves you feeling drained or like you barely got stuff done.

My key thought patterns: “Wait, what was that again? Need to rewind (or reread that)” or “How come that took longer than expected?”

Multipurposing, on the other hand, is layered.

It starts with one intentional action that supports multiple outcomes. Your energy stays focused (and more relaxed). You feel more efficient as time becomes your helper, instead of something you struggle with. And more importantly, you walk away feeling clearer, more energized, and with more ease.

My new key thought patterns: “Wow, I got so much stuff done in less time.” or “That made things much easier and more enjoyable.”

Here are some examples to make this distinction clearer:

Multitasking is taking client calls throughout the day while squeezing in admin tasks between. Multipurposing is batching all calls and meetings into two designated days (or afternoons only), leaving other days free for deep work, content creation, or rest.

Multitasking is listening to an audiobook while answering emails and scrolling through social media. Multipurposing is listening to that audiobook and jotting down notes for key insights that you can turn into Notes or longer form content with your own spin.

Multitasking is running errands while replying to DMs and listening to webinar or voiceover in the background. Multipurposing is taking your usual walking route to get some steps in, and using voice notes to capture ideas you can flesh out later or use that time to answer or create short voice messages.

Can you spot the difference?

I’ve done all of the above intentionally multiple times in the past 3 weeks, and noticed how differently I felt after:

One burnt through my attention and focus.
The other compounded my effort while being more present to the task at hand.

Nuances most people aren’t aware of

When it comes down to it, this is a seemingly subtle but powerful distinction and approach to your work life. On the surface, they can look like the same behavior. But energetically and strategically, they couldn’t be more different!

[1] Quantity vs Quality

• Multitasking gives you multiple outputs, but they’re often rushed, shallow, or require extra rounds of edits. The impact is diluted. You’re doing a lot but don’t feel fully present for most of them. You’re batching numerous tasks to increase quantity of outputs.

• Multipurposing creates compounding value. You start with a clear purpose, and then expand from there. There’s still action, but it’s layered with forethought as one thoughtful piece of work becomes fuel for multiple uses—without extra energy. You’re batching your energy and focus more effectively to increase the quality of your impact.

Blindspot: Many entrepreneurs are unknowingly recreating the same effort across multiple platforms or projects, when one well designed asset could do the heavy lifting across the board.

[2] Control vs Flow

• Multitasking often comes from a need to control outcomes. You’re trying to manage everything all that once. It pacifies the part of you that’s afraid of falling behind, disappointing others, or missing something important.

• Multipurposing unlocks that highly-coveted state of flow. It creates space for creative problem solving and deeper, big picture thinking. You’re not hustling or forcing yourself to keep up. You’re designing ease into your Work Structure that carries you forward.

Blindspot: The more you multitask, the less space you have to think creatively, intuitively, or innovatively. Multitasking steals the very brain power needed to build the business you actually want.

[3] Hustle vs Alignment

• Multitasking often reinforces an old belief: “The more or harder I work, the more productive I am.” That identity can feel noble, but it’s often rooted in proving your worth, not embodying it.

• Multipurposing supports an identity of alignment: “I use my time and energy well, because I know my worth and I don’t need to prove it through overdoing.”

Blindspot: If you tie your value to how much you do, multitasking will feel safer than slowing down. Until you question that core Work Identity belief, you will keep repeating the same patterns that lead to burnout.

Multitasking feels like rushing to check boxes

Multitasking often seems like a productivity booster. But in reality, it's a series of rapid context switches that strain your cognitive resources, leaving you feeling scattered and unfocused.

Each switch forces the brain to reorient, leading to what is known as "attention residue," where you carry mental fragments lingering from previous tasks into the next, making it harder to concentrate on new ones. This constant shifting not only increases the likelihood of errors but also contributes to mental fatigue and stress.

Repeating such patterns over time can diminish your ability to engage in deep, focused work. The more you multitask, the less effective and creative you become over time. This habit is one of the reasons why your attention span has effectively shortened to levels comparable to or even less than that of a goldfish!

Simply, when you multitask, your presence, attention, and nervous system all pay the price.

Multipurposing feels like working within your natural rhythms

When you multipurpose, you’re not stuffing more on your plate. You’re designing tasks or projects that ripple out into multiple results.

Multipurposing allows your brain to stay in a single cognitive mode longer, reducing mental fatigue and increasing output quality. Research in cognitive psychology shows that when you stay focused on one task for an extended period, you can more easily enter a state of flow, where productivity, creativity, and satisfaction naturally increase.

Instead of draining your energy by bouncing between unrelated activities, multipurposing channels it into one intentional action that produces layered results. This kind of strategic focus not only preserves your mental clarity but also builds momentum over time. By making this slight intentional tweak, you’re enhancing your efficiency without compromising your wellbeing or attention span!

More importantly, you can slow down and still feel good about it. That’s how you scale more ease.

Using one of the previous examples to illustrate the key difference between the two is that…

Multitasking is piling up multiple tasks that require similar levels or high cognitive resources to complete. When I’m running errands, my brain is trying to process where I am physically and what to do next, trying to comprehend the content of the webinar and periodically switching to different contexts in the DMs as I’m trying to think of a reply, and then typing that out.

Multipurposing is focusing on one task while keeping in mind of the multiple outcomes or at most pairing a low cognitive resources task with a higher one. My brain knows the walking route so well, it barely takes any mental effort to complete it because I can almost “do it in my sleep”. I only paired voice-message-related tasks when I was safely walking straight on the sidewalk, and I limit the number I do.

Holding my phone up while recording voice notes kept my head up and my awareness intact—versus typing with my head down, barely aware of my surroundings. (I almost walked into someone who was on his phone, too!)

Btw, you’ve probably listened to a podcast or audiobook while doing the dishes before, which is more of a form of multipurposing than just multitasking. Because your brain can go on autopilot with a physical task, while you are only increasing cognitively processing on one mental thing.

The common problem with modern day multitasking is that we try to do too much mental processing all at once and that reduces the quality of our focus and unnecessarily stretches our cognitive resources thin.

How to shift from multitask to multipurpose

Now that you are more aware of and understand the nuances between the two, let’s turn that knowledge into wisdom by putting what you learned into action.

Here are 3 tips to get you started:

1. Ask this simple question

“How can I do one thing that serves many?”

This question alone can shift the way you design your time, effort, and presence. Be clear about the why, too. As always, your why serves as your fuel for motivation and clarity. When you know why, you’re more likely to be more intentional and follow through more effectively.

2. Set a core intention

Before you start any tasks, decide on one specific and clear intention to focus on for the next x amount of time. It’s helpful to write out the intention and list the potential outputs for your efforts. Why not add in a note-to-self for how this would bring you more ease into your work life, too? This is now your anchor point. Refer to that whenever you sense your focus splitting and refocus your attention.

3. Batch your energy, not just your tasks.

If you’re in a writing flow, stay there. Don’t interrupt it to edit graphics or answer emails. Do what you need to minimize any chance of being distracted. Minimize the urge to context switch. Protect that precious creative energy you’re in.

Remember, this is an intentional choice and an experiment.

Toss out the need to be perfect. It’s about being more aware of what you’re doing and course correcting old behaviors when it happens.

If your intention is to scale more ease and not effort, then activate your curiosity and have fun with this. Trial and error different options to discover that optimal level and combination of tasks or outputs that work for you.

Like a scientist, log what you’ve noticed about your focus, energy, and quality of impact you get when you multipurpose vs multitask. Jot down what worked and what didn’t to help you take that next level of honing your multipurposing skills.

Multipurposing isn’t just a strategy. It’s a shift.

Here’s the truth: You’re not behind. You’re not broken. Your capacity isn’t the problem. It’s the way you’ve been taught to work.

What’s been draining you is how your energy has been scattered, trying to hold too many things at once without the space to breathe, think… or be.

Multipurposing isn’t just a clever strategy or hack.

It’s a reclamation.

Reclaim your presence. Reclaim your focus. Reclaim more ease in your work life. Reclaim your way of working that doesn’t cost you you.

Doing more can no longer be your choice.

This is your invitation to stop proving, stop performing, stop burning through your brilliance for scraps of progress.

Instead, focus on building momentum that actually feels good. It might feel slower but you’re building better in the long run.

You don’t have to earn your worth through overworking nor more effort.

You can show up differently and scale more ease… starting now.

P.S. If this made you nod along or finally understand about why you’re so dang tired by 2pm, tap the ❤️. Share or restack this post to help someone else swap that “busy brain burnout” for a way to work that has more flow and ease.

This is something I’ve been sitting with lately.

Because entrepreneurship isn’t just what I do—it’s often how I process, play, and create. My interests (in a way, my hobbies) are so interwoven with my business that I sometimes catch myself asking: Is this still work… or is this just me being myself?

Those lines blur fast.

Especially on nights like this. It’s 8:21 PM. My brain is on fire in the best way—connecting dots, processing ideas, and feeling fully pulled into that one idea, all while wanting to get it all out.

And yet… this is also “after hours.”

So do I ride the wave?
Or do I press pause because “I shouldn’t be working right now”?

Here’s what others have said:

You can resonate, right?

What started as a curious thought about flow turned into a deeper question…

What should actually be categorized as “work”?

For me, writing, creating, and creative problem solving don’t feel like a dull task. They feel like an elixir. Not because I’m being “productive”, but because that adrenaline rush of creativity and curiosity makes me feel alive.

This is something so many driven creatives and entrepreneurs don’t talk about enough: The fact that our interests, creative impulses, and business ideas don’t live in neat, separate boxes. They’re interwoven.

We unconsciously made them interconnected. Because that seems like the dream, right? Live and breathe our purpose. Building a business that reflects who we are, what we care about, and how we think. BUT, that also means we don’t have the clear off switch that most people do… especially when that creative flow hits outside of traditional work hours.

So here’s where it gets tricky:
Do you push that inspiration away because it came “after hours”?
Or do you follow it, knowing how rare and valuable that clarity can be?

If you’ve ever felt on fire with an idea at night, while others are relaxing or asleep, you’ve probably faced this exact dilemma.

One path feels like honoring your energy.
The other can start to feel like a quiet form of overworking.

The hidden tension: Why this isn’t a simple answer

At first glance, following a spark of inspiration late at night or over the weekend might seem like an easy call—either you go with it, or you don’t.

But what most don’t realize is that there are deeper, more nuanced forces at play.

These aren’t just surface-level productivity habits. They’re tied to your Work Identity, your energy, and the beliefs you’ve picked up about what “counts” as work.

Here are a few quiet dynamics that often go unnoticed, but shape the way we respond when inspiration strikes…

[1] The identity entanglement boundary blur

Unspoken pattern: When your identity is so wrapped up in your work that you stop knowing where you end and your business begins.

Most entrepreneurs talk about “balance,” but what’s rarely questioned is how much of our self worth, meaning, and even joy is tied to the act of creating. So when inspiration strikes, it’s not just a business idea. It feels personal. That makes it harder to walk away, even when you know that time away from what you “do” is what you actually need.

Why it matters: Without awareness, even genuinely fulfilling work can start to erode your boundaries because saying no feels like cutting off a part of yourself.

[2] The productive guilt override

Unspoken pattern: Assuming every spark of inspiration needs to be acted on immediately, or it’s wasted.

We don’t always realize how much urgency is baked into our creative response. There’s often a subtle fear: If I don’t follow this now, I’ll lose the moment. But what if that’s output panic in disguise?

Why it matters: This pattern turns creativity into a never-off switch. You stop choosing your timing and start letting ideas run the show.

[3] The misdefined “work” distortion

Unspoken pattern: Categorizing “work” as something that drains you. So if something feels good or energizing, it doesn’t count.

This is sneaky. Because when creative flow feels enjoyable, it doesn’t feel like effort. So, you might keep going past your capacity, not realizing that this “fun” output could still be something that requires rest and recovery.

Why it matters: Flow is still some form of energy expenditure. It does affect your capacity over time, and you are choosing that over other areas of your life as well. Be aware of when you could be confusing overworking for alignment.

Let me be clear.. I’m not trying to paint honoring creative flow as a bad thing.
It’s one of the best parts of building something that feels aligned.

I would like to invite you to consider what could be unknowingly fueling your motivation, as it may carry hidden layers beneath the surface.

I’m not saying don’t ride the wave.
I’m inviting you to pause and ask—what’s really driving me in this moment?

What I’m learning is this:
It’s not just when the idea hits that matters.
It’s why I choose to follow it… or not.

When is it self abandonment? When is it inspired action? When is it workaholism? When is it honoring… me, and what feels so right at this very moment?

The truth is, I’ve lived through enough creative dry spells to know—when the muse shows up, I don’t want to send her away. But at the same time, I’m also no longer interested in defaulting to late night hustle disguised as passion either.

So what I’m practicing now is the pause.

Not a shutdown, not a rejection, not avoidance. Just a moment to ask:

• Does this idea need to be addressed now… or can it wait until later?

• Will this fill me up, or quietly deplete me without me realizing it?

• What am I choosing to sacrifice at this moment by following the muse?

It’s not about having the right answer every time.

It’s about building enough self trust to know when to ride the wave… and when to save it for later.

…and because there are times when spending quality newlywed time with my husband matters more than following the flow.

RELATED POST - Experiment Field Notes

P.S. If this helped you name and reconsider the nuance between flow and overworking, give it a 💜. Share or restack this post to support someone who’s quietly navigating the same blurry edge.

✨ Special thanks to of Embracing Ageing, of Unscripted: Screw the Should Life, and of Full Life Collective for giving me permission to share your wonderful comments for this Post.

Check out their Substacks. If something resonates, you’ve got a new inbox favorite.

There’s something that’s been bubbling beneath the surface for months—the kind of discomfort that starts as a whisper and grows louder until you can’t ignore it anymore.

I’m out of alignment.

Not because I was off track, but because I’ve been doing too much of what’s not mine.

In the process, I slipped back into patterns I thought I’d outgrown—chasing, cramming, overcommitting, overthinking, and overdoing.

After I wrote my book “Outsmarting the Hustle” last October, which outlines how to build a business you love without burning yourself out, life took a sharp turn. Ironically, I found myself drowning in the exact workaholic hustle I want to free entrepreneurs from.

I was working nights and weekends, excusing my workaholism for purpose and high levels of motivation.

I was squeezing large workloads before and after trips, juggling far too much while trying to “make up for lost time.”

I felt behind, scattered. I felt like I had to prove myself all over again after pivoting my coaching focus from dating to entrepreneurship.

And that wasn’t all…

I also didn’t want to build the business I used to have.

I definitely don’t want to build the business everyone says I “should.”

I am also done chasing after other people’s versions of success that didn’t even feel right in the first place.

Releasing the book this week as planned didn’t feel right with Debilitating Imposter Syndrome blocking my path like a linebacker-built bouncer with his arms crossed and deep voice scoffing at little ol’ me trying to shyly sneak by, “Where do YOU think you’re going? You want to release your book? Ha! That’s not happening.”

Yup, I felt like an imposter—Who am I to teach and write about all this when my life looks like this big, uncertain mess at the moment?

I know what I shared in this book works. I lived it, and I miss it so much, too.

And here’s what I realized…

This true goal isn’t about launching a book.

It’s about sharing the message inside it.

So instead of releasing chapters, I’m going to live them out by example.

Right here, in real time… with you, my beloved subscribers.

Because truthfully, I’m not here to hand you a perfect plan.

I can share plenty of helpful principles and insightful stories, but nothing is more powerful than actually being in the experience and also trying it for yourself.

“That’s it! I am doing a build in public experiment.”

*deep breath* Oh my, those words felt scary to share, and even scarier to think about doing in the first place! I had to take 2 weeks to carefully process this idea and tune within, and it felt so undeniably right! So here goes…

I am reshaping my current business and work structure (as they are now) into ones that I actually want and that truly work for me.

Entrepreneurs don’t have the luxury of starting from a clean, fresh slate with no other responsibilities. You do it messy and build the freaking plane as you fly it.

So THAT is what I’ll be demonstrating with my Posts going forward.

This is about creating a better work life that actually supports my energy, my future, and the kind of life I want to live—including enjoying someday becoming a mom and building in the space to be flexible and adaptable to upcoming work and life changes.

I will gradually and sustainably integrate changes to my work structure, little by little.

From burned out, exhausted, overworked, no work boundaries, lots of uncertainties, and a new business to one that:

• Protects my energy and prioritizes my wellbeing without guilt

• Makes space for life to actually happen—joy, presence, rest, relationships, kids

• Functions sustainably without depending on constant hustle or overgiving

• Supports deep, meaningful work that feels spacious and fulfilling

• Provides consistent, steady income while honoring how I want to feel day to day

• Feels flexible and freeing, not rigid or pressure-filled

• Allows me to grow, lead, and serve sustainably without self sacrifice or soul draining urgency

I am moving forward without unwanted hustle, urgency, or pretense. I’m leaning in with slowing down with intention, curiosity, and experimentation.

In other words, this is about creating a business that fuels me, not just a business I have to fuel.

This is not a productivity hack. This is a reclamation!

And what am I boldly claiming?

Creating AND sustaining a 4 day work week in 8 months

Because I want more freedom, not just more flexibility.
Because I want to stop living on the edge of burnout.
Because I want my business to support my life, not consume it.

And because if I don’t redesign how I work now, I’ll keep defaulting to old ways that no longer serve who I’m becoming.

This isn’t about proving anything.

It’s about exploring what’s possible—and I invite you to join me.

I have a vision and direction. I have a methodology, and I have some great ideas.

Here’s what I was scared to also publicly admit, but now proud to say:

I don’t have it all figured out. That’s the point.

I’m not claiming to have all the answers, but I do claim the willingness to find out.

I will treat my life and business like a series of little experiments—small intentional actions that help me learn what’s working, what’s not, and what actually feels right.

This is about mindful productivity, adaptive learning, and redefining what “enough” and success mean to me.

And it’s also about showing up with you. Not ahead of you, not above you, but… with… you.

It’s ok. I’m afraid, too… but I’m doing it anyway.

Here’s what’s real:

• I don’t want to pretend I have it all together.

• I don’t want to sell you a “proven strategy” that I’m not using myself.

• I do want to pull back the curtain and share not just what is and isn’t working, but also the reasons and principles of why, so that you can apply the how to create your own rhythms, your own systems, and your own version of success.

Because I believe:

• Productivity isn’t about doing more—it’s about doing what matters.

• There aren’t any one-size-fits-all strategies—it’s about learning how to adapt them effectively to your own circumstances.

• Rest isn’t a reward—it’s part of the rhythm.

• Making money isn’t “THE” goal—it’s about having resources to use so that you can enjoy your version of a great life. In other words, your business should serve your life, not the other way around!

This isn’t a rigid or rigorous execution (that would drive me nuts).

It’s a life practice—built on values, reflection, and micro adjustments that allow us to live more fully.

Want to join me?

If you’ve felt scattered, stuck, or stretched thin…
If you’re tired of the pressure, pace, or productivity hacks…
If you’ve been second guessing how you work or why you work in the way you do…
If something in you is whispering “there has to be another way”…

This is my invitation for you to explore with me.

Don’t worry. There will be no waking up at 5am. No cold plunges required. No cramming more work into less time. No strict or rigid boundaries that test your willpower for continuous days straight.

I’m sharing this with you…
Not to copy my process, but to find your own.
Not to hustle more, but to honor what matters most.

You just need the courage to pause and ask, “What could be possible if you tried?” Then experiment alongside me.

Subscribe now

What’s next

We’ll be doing this exploration within the Work OS Sandbox.

And over the next 8 months to the end of November, I’ll be sharing through my Posts:

• Research, insights, and honest updates of all the ups and downs

• Behind the scenes strategies, systems, and results

• Tools, templates, and experiments to apply to your own work life

• And maybe… the book launch, when the time is right and aligned

Because this isn’t about rushing.

It’s about rebuilding—consciously, clearly, and courageously.

And it starts with a direction and one small step.

For me, that direction is a 4 day work week, and that first small step is sharing it here.

For you, it could be that or something else.

And if you’re ready to find out, I’m right here with you.

Are you in? (Click the heart button for yes!)

P.S. If this resonated and you’re open to exploring with me, share or restack this post. You never know who’s quietly craving a different way of working—and your share might be the gentle nudge they needed to believe it’s possible, too.

December has become a month of pause and reflection for me. Craving time to slow down, breathe, and step back to honor the learnings and experiences of the year that has passed. I find myself retreating into my introverted hermit mode—shutting out the world to create more serenity and limiting interactions to only those most dear to me.

It’s deeply humbling to look back at the lessons Life wove into this year’s challenging and celebrated moments. Some lessons felt like gentle nudges, while others shook and crumbled my foundation down to its core.

Regardless of how they showed up, they all shaped the way I’ve grown, the way I have or haven’t shown up, and the way I envision what’s possible moving forward.

In honoring that reflective spirit, I combed through my posts from this “year” (technically, 6 months of posts since I started this Substack) and highlighted 3 of the most impactful lessons I’ve learned this year—and hey, these may resonate with you, too.

SETBACK 01 — Burnt crispy by the endless comparisonitis chase

Here’s the dark secret and reality of entrepreneurship: people mostly openly share and emphasize their accolades and diminish (or hide) their behind-the-scenes turmoil.

Their success is like an iceberg. You only see the tip, but the mass of their success is underwater, behind the scenes.

You can never understand the depth of what they had to go through, even if you experienced it yourself… because you’re not them.

So when I was trying so hard to implement other people’s methods of success but not getting similar results, I blamed myself for failing again and kept chasing after the next potential solution. That’s when I realized that…

What I previously blamed myself for are actually outcomes for not doing things that are in alignment with me.

It wasn’t because I wasn’t “good enough” or “faulty” in some way.

It’s because I pushed myself to the point where I can’t force that inauthenticity anymore…

This was a rude awakening for me. Read the full post to get the backstory birthed from frustration and disappointments and the lessons it taught me that kickstarted a few big strategic pivots this year.

SETBACK 02 — Crippled by nonexistent work boundaries

When you’re depleted, everything feels urgent, and your boundaries are weakened. You convince yourself you have to do more, even when “more” is the very thing that’s keeping you stuck.

When you overpromise, you might think you’re helping your business, your audience, or your goals. But in reality, you’re eroding trust—both with yourself and with others.

Saying “no” isn’t just a boundary. It’s a gift to yourself and others.

There was so much more to this, so check out the full post to discover how those yeses deplete your energy + potential and my suggestions to help save yourself from that burnout promise quicksand!

SETBACK 03 — Drained by all the overdoing churn and burnout

When you push yourself relentlessly, you risk losing yourself trying to be like someone else or trying to impress others. You risk exhaustive burnout and sacrificing what actually matters. You risk draining your passion, focus, and motivation—the very things that fuel your business.

“So, what are you rushing towards?”

I had to ask myself this and ruthlessly modified my goals and schedule for the next few months. I created more space for me to reflect and breathe. I set firmer boundaries to protect my downtime and vacation.

The hardest part was being honest with myself as to what wasn’t sustainable or realistic for me. Just because it’s right for someone else, that doesn’t mean it’s right for me. I had to face my own limitations and own up to what I could no longer do.

This wasn’t easy to admit, and I share more in-depth in the full post on how I exited the burnout fast lane and tossed out the 3 productivity lies that were handcuffing me to overdoing and exhaustion.

Here’s another helpful post if your neverending to do list has been draining you and creating stress levels off the charts, too!

As I continue charging ahead as the Soulfueled guinea pig and advocate, please generously and wisely learn from my mistakes!

Take this moment to pause with me, reflect on how far we’ve come, and open ourselves to the extraordinary possibilities that await us in the new year.

P.S. Here’s a little secret: These 3 setbacks are also what I call “Disruptors” mentioned in my upcoming book “Outsmarting the Hustle: How to simplify your work, avoid burnout, and build a business you love”. I’m working on a quiz to help you discover which Disruptors you might be stalling your progress, and what you can do about them, too.

It was NOT a coincidence that these lessons heavily loomed over me earlier this year as they became excellent, undeniably relevant material for me to turn into a book.

So if you’re curious about the book or quiz, let me know! Who knows… I might give you the link to check them out before they’re officially released to the public.

USEFUL JOURNAL PROMPTS

What were valuable insights from your top 3-5 lessons this year? Consider how you can plan better and integrate those learnings so that you won’t have to repeat those same learning experiences again next year.

November 8th, 2024 at 735pm

I grieved the death and the end by delivering the last email to a newsletter I’ve been writing for 4 years.

By making that public announcement to my email list, it became very real that I had closed down the dating niche era of my business.

This bittersweet turmoil and grief have been weighing on me heavily, and I sat on that email for nearly 2 weeks, wondering… “What should I say?… How do I close out this chapter of my business and life?”

I’ve sent out Paper Planes (the name of that newsletter) for 4 years now, and it really started to gain traction in the past couple of years. I’ve even incorporated paper planes into my brand photos, too, as they have become a part of my identity.

But the disheartening part is that my heart is no longer in promoting dating content.

I saw how excited and dedicated other dating coaches continued to be with the topic… as I felt my passion waning.

It took a lot of courage to face that, especially since I was featured in Kit’s newsletter in August, and I’ve been getting invites to be a part of dating summits and events and podcast interviews, too.

…but I had to be honest with myself.

Last March 7th (2023) around 430pm

My then-business coach asked me, “Is this really what you want to do?”

I was in denial and decided to prove her wrong by doubling down on my commitment.

So, for more than a year, I made a big push to grow that newsletter and business, thinking that would “solve” the diminishing interest… but that frustration only bubbled deeper.

As a desperate final attempt to try another approach, I hired another top-tier business coach last December and went 120% all in with his strategies and methodologies.

I got results, but I hustled my way to burnout.

June 12th, 2024 at 930am

This conversation made me see what and where I’ve been going about this all wrong.

On my last coaching call with him, he got really real with me. He transparently shared his journey and made me realize that no matter where you are in entrepreneurship, how I felt was a continual struggle. That’s when I realized chasing after the “right” strategy was a fool’s errand. It’s about crafting the proper strategy for me that was going to get me to that glorious, holy grail of “there”.

And with alllllll the different courses, programs, coaching, certifications, books, and numerous types of content I’ve come across and consumed, I had more than enough options and data points I could pull from.

More importantly, that call awakened something deeper within me. Because, at the root of it, my life has been evolving, and my soul has been leading me elsewhere.

I had to create the courage to follow my heart

I had to face all my fears, doubts, concerns, and the seeming sense of failure. Pivoting a moving ship with momentum isn’t easy. I had to pump the brakes to make sure I wasn’t speeding down the wrong path or building something unsustainable in the long run.

In the process of slowing down and tuning within, I had my answer.

Even though I have plenty of more wisdom to share in regards to relationship building, it’s time for that to evolve beyond dating... and open it up to more. Plus, that intuitive strategist within me has been having so much fun supporting others on the side for more than a year, and she’s yearning to help even more people!

That’s why I took that leap of faith in starting this Substack in June and sharing my mission to build a business with a proper work life balance that fits within my desired lifestyle. All because I’m DONE with all the hustling and inauthentic strategies! I am dedicating my time and energy to establishing a well-rounded, Soulfueled work life instead.

I feel very exposed by making this vulnerable choice to share my journey on Substack. I’ve been let down. I’ve been steered in the wrong directions. I’ve even been swindled. I’ve also made plenty of silly mistakes, too. But the severity of those can’t compare to how the current status quo and what we’ve bought into all feel so broken. These conversations need to be had and shared, so that you don’t make those same costly mistakes I did with my time, money, and wellbeing.

As I create, build, and grow this new business, I’m happy to spearhead this Soulfueled way like a mad scientist, using myself as a guinea pig experimenting, testing, and gathering feedback, so that I can report back results and strategies that could work for you, too.

I want to be an encouraging voice on your journey to show that what you want IS possible. It’s ok to remain a solopreneur. It’s ok to run your business with a small support team, whether they’re contractors or employees. You don’t need to keep 10x-ing your progress and process to have the impact and financial results you want.

I now understand that I’ve been substantially feeling all the challenges and pain points of entrepreneurship, so I can transform my experiences into something relatable and practical to overcome and share.

I had enough content to even write a book in 2 weeks! I’ve planned out future workshops and mini courses. I’ve even invested in having a dedicated app and platform to host all this content and grow this Soulfueled community.

No, this won’t be a temporary interest or a side hobby.

This is a way of life I am fully committed to!

Cheers to embracing a Soulfueled way of being and this new beginning of something amazingly aligned.

USEFUL JOURNAL PROMPTS

What is the calling from your heart and soul that you have been ignoring or putting off? What specifically is holding you back from doing it? What’s something you can do to create the courage you need to get started?

P.S. Click the ❤️ if this reminded you that it’s never too late to pivot and honor what’s truly calling you. Share or restack this post to help remind others that letting go of what no longer fits is what makes space for what’s finally right.

My mind has been running on overdrive with ideas, strategies, and excitement.

…so this post is arriving later than usual (but hey, it’s still within one hour of my end-of-week deadline).

I’ve met with two experts⏤who kindly guided me while I consciously discerned what I choose to adopt.

I’ve met with my two accountability groups⏤sharing and exchanging learnings to help each other up level.

Sure, it’s good to strategize and process all these amazing inspired ideas and actions, and, at the same time…

What I needed most was REST

Time away to let all this amazingness stew in my unconscious.

Working more and harder isn’t always the best solution.

Yes, do take action.

…and sometimes the right action to take is to step away momentarily.

Don’t wait until your body forces you to do so.
That’s how burnout builds up over time.

It takes courage to rest, too, and not give in to those workaholic tendencies, especially when I’m passionate about something.

Quiet that anxious side within me, scolding me for not doing enough or getting “there” fast enough.

It’s clear that critical, annoyed voice wasn’t my intuition, because my Higher Self would speak to me in a kinder, more patient way.

It takes a lot of intentionality to counter that deeply ingrained work ethic and reprogram myself to honor rest, relaxation, silence, and doing nothing.

I’d feel so much guilt and shame resting.

Then I’d contradictorily chastise myself for working too much.

No matter which state I was in, I’d make myself feel wrong… and that was exhausting, feeling like I “should” do the opposite.

Things changed when I chose to stop that pattern:
Celebrate when I’m in my flow.
Indulge when I wanted to do nothing related to work.
Honor the fact that I need both to feel fulfilled and happy.

They both have their places, and enjoying either state isn’t wrong.

It’s more than ok to rest!

Remove yourself from any stress.
I went to a yoga class, and the answer to what I was trying to solve came to me in mid-pose. I was talking to my plants as I was gardening, and some of my wandering thoughts gave me the opportunity to gut check my new developments with my Work Life Vision.

Relax without any guilt or shame.
I indulged in our hobbies with my boyfriend, which kept my mind busy and away from work thoughts.

Retreat from all the external stimulations.
I took a few long walks with my pup without any audio entertainment and enjoyed the silence.

Trust that when you’re ready, you’ll know exactly what to do next.
When you step away, the most important considerations and brilliant solutions will surface. That includes the limiting beliefs that haunt you the most, because when you resolve those, you’ll go even further. Trying to pull yourself out of it sooner or over worrying about the what if’s don’t do any good.

TIP: Keep a writing device nearby to jot down any inspired thoughts for later.

Let go in the present and surrender… to… rest.

You’ll emerge from rest with more clarity, energy, and focus for what’s next.

This week’s post is shorter and later, BUT I am excited about the Meet + Greet this Wednesday, Sept 25 at 5pm PST (convert to your time zone). Both free and paid subscribers are welcome to join!

Come meet me and other fellow Soulfueled Entrepreneurs. The floor is open to chat about anything, and feel free to ask about any of these recent Soulfueled developments, too. Plus, I’ll take you through a short, insightful exercise at the end as well.

Btw, this won’t be recorded and I’ll send out the Zoom link via Chat.

See you then!

USEFUL JOURNAL PROMPTS

What do you honestly think about rest? What are some undeniable signs of when you need rest? Then, consider what are some warning signs before it gets to that point of exhaustion and burnout.

P.S. Tap the 💜 to remind yourself that rest can be the most productive thing you do. Share or restack this post to help remind others that clarity often arrives when we stop trying to force it.

I sat there in shock, mixed with awe and excitement, as I was having a mindblowing “Holy shit. Well, that just happened!” moment.

ALL my current plans went out the window, shattered.

A sudden, massive pivot was needed.

I was so excited about and proud of this long post I was going to share that I even wrote it and recorded the voiceover earlier than usual. Now unscheduled, left in draft.

I had set up all these systems and additional posts to support the announcement I was going to make today. All unpublished and turned off.

I was busily working on this project because, in my mind, these were obviously the logical next steps.

…until I heard the words, “This isn’t a freebie, Kat. This is a WHOLE course or program.”

Those profound, honest words shook me to my core because… she was right

In the back of my mind, I knew what she said was true.

Yes, I am absolutely onto something, but the scale and vision of it in my head had to expand greatly.

I assumed it was a freebie, because it came so quickly and easily to me.

I put it together with so much ease, and I filled it in with such clarity that I assumed others would be able to do the same, too.

It has been such a valuable resource that I wanted to widely share this in hopes of helping you in the ways it has helped me.

Clearer direction. Motivating inspiration. Sparking excitement again.

This solution sprung from an inspired action to get me out of a deep, reflective phase of uncertainty, despair, and a massive lack of motivation.

It became my blueprint for what fulfillment personally looks like to me.

I stopped chasing after other people’s versions of success… because I created my own.

Plus, with this foundation set, creating your Work Vision would be so much easier and more comprehensive.

Yes, this is it. This would be a great entryway to the Soulfueled way of being!

It seemed like a good first step.

…but it was actually a big leap for others.

That became more and more evident as I gathered other spot-on constructive feedback from 10 other trusted, insightful individuals of various backgrounds, life situations, and experience levels.

…because they didn’t have the same context, similar belief systems in place, and a particular thought process already installed.

What came easy to me is actually my secret sauce.

What’s obvious or logical to me is unique to me… and that needed to be explained to others.

My skill sets are my zones of genius that I just took for granted!

That’s why this “freebie” is actually a whole course or program.

In the next 35 mins, quickly formulated a new plan and strategic approach for me. She broke down my intentions and thought processes into a more effective step-by-step system that was easier to go through.

It was like she magically opened a whole new world to me and freaking gave me the map, too!

Then it was like everything relevant to what I’ve learned from other programs and coaches suddenly came flooding at me at the same time.

Holy shit, this is IT!

THIS is how it all comes together.

I’ve been asking myself this for the past 4 months since I had this simple little idea to start this Substack.

But back then, I had no idea how this was going to come together or how it would be received either.

This felt like a pivot, a separate business, or even a distraction from my dating niche.

My conscious mind couldn’t logically think through a way to bring them together.

My insecurities sounded alarms, screaming, “That’s a scary shiny object! Don’t do it! You’re just using this as a distraction to not deal with your challenges right now. No, no. Don’t go there.”

But my heart and soul were steady, loving, and encouraging. They reassuringly told me, “Trust and surrender. We got you.”

It was one of those intuitive moments of “I don’t know why I’m doing this, but it feels like the right move.”

…and this is me looking back and now going, “Oh, I get it now. That’s why I did what I did to get here.”

Welcome to the realities of being an entrepreneur!!

Your carefully laid plans will get tossed out the window… repeatedly.

Good and bad surprises will shake things up and challenge your resolve.

Whatever you assumed will be put to the test.

You learn to be more flexible with the unexpected, calmly adaptable to changing situations, and problem solving quickly on your feet.

These are the times when it’s good to keep your vision close to your heart and clearly in your mind.

Don’t worry about the how or even the what.

Just keep focusing on the why and where you’re heading.

You will get there.

It’s never a straight line or how you strategically planned.

Twists, turns, and detours are all normal.

You’ll pick up plenty of learnings and skillsets along the way.

Synchronicities become your wayfinding signs that you’re headed in the right direction.

Trust.

Surrender.

Freaking, just go with the flow.

…while keep checking your compass and map (aka your vision) for where you intend to go.

You’ll be just fine.

All those hows and whats always work themselves out.

Overly stressing about needing to know everything ahead of time or have it all carefully planned out before taking action will become a hindrance to your success.

That’s you needing to have a security blanket… because you’re scared.

Being scared and uncertain are normal states for an entrepreneur.

It’s not that the successful ones don’t feel them.

It’s just that they keep taking action and trust that they’ll figure it out along the way.

You won’t have all the answers from the start because you’re meant to find the right answers as… you… go.

Your current self will never know enough as much as your future self.

So why stress or be anxious about things that are out of your current control?

Alright, now what?

Well, my vision is still the same.

But the how and what are now even in closer alignment with my Work Vision than before, and it’s coming together even better than I originally planned!

With this new knowledge, I’m thinking better, clearer, and more strategic than I did before.

So, it’s back to the drawing board on some plans, but far from being back at square 1.

I’ve already braindumped tons of great insights and loosely set up my plan forward.

It’s going to be a blend of strategizing and building as I go, and that’s perfectly fine.

Timing for what I’ve previously shared will shift, but ultimately, this is all for the better.

None of what I’ve done so far, which was A LOT in these past couple of weeks, has gone to waste. In fact

, they have set a solid foundation for what’s to come.

The new things I’ll be putting in place will actually set you up for better success. It’ll serve you better because you’ll get all the proper context and explanations needed to then easily do this for yourself.

Oh, man. Seriously, this is all so exciting.

I was on this exhilarating high yesterday after my call with Donna, elatedly sharing my updates with my accountability groups, and then becoming completely discombobulated until I was able to journal out my 1000 mph thoughts into a doc.

(Psst, for my fellow woo ones out there: Oh my, so THIS is what a divine download feels like!)

Alright, I’m off to work through this some more. Stay tuned for further updates!

USEFUL JOURNAL PROMPTS

Where can you give yourself some grace and compassion? What are the concerns holding you back from taking action, and what’s one action you can easily take now to bring you more clarity?

P.S. If you're all for normalizing the messy, magical process of figuring it out as you go, tap the 🧡 to let me know you’re on this journey, too. Share or restack this post to help remind others that what feels uncertain now might be the exact breakthrough they've been waiting for.

Rejection!

Oomph, doesn’t that sometimes feel like a modern-day life or death scenario?

Your fight or flight responses get activated.

Or you might even preemptively avoid it because you don’t want to deal with all the different scenarios playing out in your head.

Why does hearing the word “no” often create such a gut wrenching reaction or even something we avoid?

Instead of being upfront with someone, we come out with the roundabout “no” answers.

“Maybe, I’ll think about it” = no

Saying a lackluster “yah, totally” or pacifying “sure, that sounds good” but never following up on it = no

Detouring the conversation to avoid giving an answer = no

And we’ve ALL heard of the term “ghosting” when it comes to dating = noooope, and I don’t want to tell you directly, and we also experience this with leads or potential clients who do the same.

“While we have absolutely no control over the actions of others, we do have total and complete control over how we react. What if we decided to make each no we received and every rejection we encountered something that empowers us? Instead of avoiding rejection, what if we made the decision to seek rejection? Instead of avoiding no or perhaps simply tolerating it, what if we went out of our way to actually go for no!”

―Richard Fenton and Andrea Waltz
Authors of “Go for No! Yes is the Destination, No is How You Get There”

Seeing rejection differently

Exactly like that quote mentioned, what if we normalized rejection as a part of the process and didn’t take it so personally?

When we get rejected or hear the word “no” in all its creative forms, we create stories in our heads about what that means about us or what we’ve done.

All the self criticism and self judgement can typically fall under these two categories:

“They don’t like me.” or “I wasn’t enough.”

But NONE of these are facts, they’re merely an opinion, a certain perception, and merely one possibility.

You don’t know the other person’s true reasons.

Oftentimes when people say “no”, it’s mostly about them and their own reasons.

Ok, sure. They might project it onto you as an excuse, but underneath their reason is merely “this isn’t the right fit for me.” (See, it’s still about them.)

Sometimes, they’re not even fully sure of why they said “no” outside of the feeling of “no, I don’t want this.”

Show up differently towards rejections

So what if we didn't see being ourselves as “not enough”?

Being able to show up completely as yourself is EMPOWERING.

Putting yourself out there takes COURAGE.

Not giving a shit about what others think is LIFE CHANGING.

Rejection nowadays is far from a life and death scenario, but somehow our lizard brains are still interpreting it as so.

And that’s the thing, it doesn’t have to be.

You can retrain your mind to see it differently.

Change that “no” from an “Omg, this is the end of the world” dramatic reaction to a neutral and mundane “Ok, that happened. Moving on. Next!”

Instead of hiding and playing small to avoid rejection or judgment, what if you showed up exactly as you are regardless of what others think, do, say, or believe?

Keep showing up as you and sharing what you’re doing, because you’re looking for the right people to say “yes” to you.

Getting no’s is just a part of the process, regardless of why they said “no.”

“No” is empowering

Think of the times that you’ve said “no” to other people. Why did you say “no” to them?

It’s because you were choosing yourself, stating a preference, and prioritizing something else instead.

Saying “no” empowers you because it is your choice. And that is YOUR right.

Let’s respect each other’s “no”.

“No” means “Yes” to something else

If that person said “no,” great! Now you can now find someone else who would say “yes” to you instead.

You’re not wasting your time and effort on someone who’s wishy washy nor fully invested.

This should be liberating!

“No” releases you from dead weight.

“No” as temporal

“No” doesn’t mean “never”.

It could just be a “not yet” because it might just be bad timing right now.

So don’t give up, and you can just ask again later.

“No” is just feedback

You can respond with a “Why not?” and learn from it.

Don’t assume why they said “no.” There’s no harm in asking additional follow up questions.

That extra step allows you to learn why and take it as feedback—maybe there was just a miscommunication, maybe it’s bad timing, or maybe they don’t see the value in what you’re asking.

Then YOU have the power to decide how to react and move on.

So the next time you hear “no”, treat it as if someone said “thingamabob” (or whatever random word you can think of).

It’s just a label.

You don’t have to give it any additional meaning to it or even take it personally.

Choose to see “no” from a positive point of view and determine what you could learn from it.

USEFUL JOURNAL PROMPTS

What have you successfully done in the past to help you cope with rejection? How can you use that to reduce your fears and concerns the next time you’re scared to get rejected?

P.S. Tap the 🧡 if this helped you see rejection in a new light or take it less personally. Share or restack this if you believe more entrepreneurs deserve to stop fearing “no” and start trusting themselves again.

I feel like I’m running on this neverending hamster wheel.
The more I work, the faster I’m caught up in the whirlwind of neverending tasks.

It’s like I can’t escape my workaholic nature.

I was a workaholic at a startup.
I was a workaholic in corporate.
I am a workaholic as an entrepreneur.

I keep getting into these crazy, all-out sprints, cramming possibly months of work into weeks. My perfectionist nature doesn’t make that easier as I set these high standards for the quality of my work.

I am passionate about what I’m doing but I continuously put myself in these situations where I overdo it by trying to do too much at once. Then, inevitably, my body forces me to come to a grinding halt to rest.

It never feels enough.

There is always too much to do.

I’m a continual work in progress, aiming to overcome this old pattern.

So I keep making changes before, during, and after, hoping something will finally stick.

I’ve learned a lot, and I get frustrated a lot as well.

I get impatient with my progress and inflicted by comparisonitis.

Ugh, how can I finally put a stop to this unrelenting churn?

Each time I go through these phases, I do uncover learnings, such as…

• Taking a step back, reexamining my progress, and modifying my plans going forward.

• How to have quality, guilt-free rest as I rewarded myself with some well-deserved time off, too.

• Appreciating the value of patience and slowing down.

• Define what “hustling” looks like, and how it no longer serves me.

• Redefine what “success” means to me, so I know how to lead my life as I build and scale my business.

• Outlining what things and activities fuel my soul, so I can ritualistically prioritize more time for them.

• Having acceptance of who I am and honoring my pace.

I didn’t know about these things when I first embarked on this difficult journey.

I had only heard of the success, opulence, and ease.

We all get sucked in by their success stories and now wondrous lives.

Their years of pain, sweat, and tears that led to their seemingly overnight success are often obscured and simplified.

And if they’re selling you their services, then, of course, they’ll highlight their wildly successful stories and minimize details on those who failed.
…and that skews your perception of what it truly takes.

No matter how they describe their journey, their words can never fully encompass all they went through. As an observer, you can only imagine and guestimate so much of what all that was like without experiencing it yourself.

Plus, you’re not them… as we all have different skillsets, talents, experiences, and life circumstances.

It’s only by experiencing firsthand that you can get a grasp of the tireless efforts they went through.

Being an entrepreneur takes your individual personal growth to a whole other level.

You’re pushed beyond your limits, over and over again.

You’re constantly juggling multiple roles at once.

You’re learning, experimenting, executing, serving, tweaking, optimizing, and failing.

You’re endlessly solving and anticipating problems.

You’re forced to face your fears, weaknesses, and limitations.

None of this is easy.

So I want to have these honest conversations with you.

I hope by revealing my experiences and insights you can shortcut your entrepreneurial journey by doing it your way, at your pace, and, more importantly, to your liking.

Hustling is only one approach. It doesn’t have to be yours.

Your life story is still being written, and you have the power to change your future by what you choose to do now.

What you want is possible.

What you dream of can be yours.

I invite you to join me in this new approach of soul-fueling entrepreneurship.

USEFUL JOURNAL PROMPTS

Take a moment and consider what is your perspective on hustling and how that approach has affected your life. What are things you can adjust to improve your quality of life?

P.S. If this post helped you feel seen or gave you permission to slow down, tap the ❤️ to let me know. Share or restack this to help others caught in the same cycle of doing too much. This kind of honest conversation is something more of us need.